“I’ll pour pure water over you and scrub you clean. I’ll give you a new heart, put a new spirit in you."

Ezekiel 36:25 (The Message//Remix)

Monday, May 31, 2010

... I can find a friend.

Tonight I had an intense talk with my best friend and it only made me realize how much love I have for this person. This person means more to me than I thought and it took a church service this morning to realize just how much he means to me. This morning we talked about friendship and what it means to be a friend. The example that they used was the friendship between David and Jonathan... two of the most unlikely people to be friends but what really hit me is that "an immediate bond was forged between them" by God. Another version I have says that "Jonathan became one in spirit with David, and he loved him as himself." (1 Samuel 18:1)

David: the man God appointed to be King of Israel
Jonathan: the heir to the throne

David became closer than a brother to Jonathan and he did anything to protect him... even though David would take the throne and Jonathan would STILL be second in command, only not to his family, but to a Shepard boy from Bethlehem (which at the time was a very lowly city).

so what is a friend?
1.) a friend realizes the challenges in that relationship. They don't run away from them, or try to act like they don't exist. They tackle them head on TOGETHER and work through them in order to figure out how to make the friendship work no matter what! challenges can also be conflict. Conflict has to be dealt with. and you know what! I don't care what anyone says, conflict is healthy for any relationship! But it can serve two purposes... it can destroy or it can establish an even stronger bond.

2.) a friend is committed to you. NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO! a friend stays put and says "I don't care what you do, or where you go - I will still love you, and I will still stand here!"

3.) a friend protects you. Whether you want your friend there or not, a friend will get involved in your battles and head up the army so that you don't have to fight alone!

4.) a friend will not let you abandon your dreams! They are there to remind you of your dreams, to help you get back on track when you loose your focus. One of my favorite quotes is "A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart, and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words!" I feel like this says everything, at least to me! A true friend knows you inside and out and won't let you forget your desires and won't let you give up!

5.)finally... a friend is a friend for life. Did you hear me! I said FOR LIFE! You can't get rid of me! I am hear for good. David and Jonathan faced so many trials that could have easily ripped them apart... they spent years apart from each other, but yet they still remained friends until the end when Jonathan was killed in battle. and You hear David speak about their relationship in 2 Samuel, about how important Jonathan meant to him! Proverbs 17:17a says "Friends love through all kinds of weather!"

Proverbs 18:24 "Friends come and friends go, but a true friend sticks by you like family."

Now, by no means did I come up with any of this, but I did find this interesting. This is the THIRD time I have encountered this story and "friendship" since Wednesday. So I really wanted to take the time to think about it. I'm not one who has a lot of "friends" I have a lot of acquaintances but as far as people who will keep up with me after I leave Niceville, I could probably count them on 2 hands (which is much better than it used to be). And then the conversations I have had today, it just blows my mind! I have a new developing friendship with someone I haven't seen in years, but they actually seem to genuinely care and I don't understand why! I have an engaged couple... that enjoys my company! and I have the best friend that anyone could ever ask for! Don't get me wrong, I have many other people that mean so very much to me but these four people have really been on my mind the past few days. These four people and my bizarre friendships with them. But, for now I have one that needs a little reminder of why we are friends. So if David and Jonathan are the "biblical example" here goes everything... total vulnerability. this is for my best friend!

1.) A friend realizes the challenges/conflicts. Did You know that we have never not resolved a conflict! and none of them have ever ended badly! Did you also realize that we are polar opposites when it comes to personality but yet somehow it still works. Yeah, I go out with big groups, but guess what you sacrifice too. You step away sometimes to come watch a movie with me cause I don't want to be with a bunch of people, and you will go inside Dairy Queen and eat a blizzard with me so that I can be a foolish little girl for 5 minutes.

2.) A friend is committed to you no matter what! Alright, guess what you tried to get rid of me because you thought it would be better for me, but you know what It didn't work! Remember when you also helped me through all my other broken relationships despite fears of your own about ours!

3.) A friend protects you. Dude, you have been leading the army in like 90% of my battles! You are the one to get heated because such and such said this or did this to me. when I just tried to take it and hold everything in, you were the one standing there saying "Its okay to go talk to them about it!" well maybe not exactly like that but still you get what I mean.

4.) A friend will not let you abandon your dreams. Alright, seriously now think about me when I met you. I honestly did not think I could sing or could ever make it in any music career. You helped me find the strength to keep going. You were the first one to hear my songs, and you encourage me to keep writing! and guess what you are the only one with a song dedicated to them! oh and by the way, I still credit you as part of the reason I got my solo in Show Choir this year. Then with everything with ministry and trying to find where I fit into the mold, you were always there. ALWAYS! even when I said I want to be a freaking missionary! I told you I wanted to endanger my life to love others... I believe those were my exact words too haha. You told me I could do it! oh, and don't forget that I hated myself when you first met me! and had no self-confidence until about 6 months ago. Granted that wasn't all you, but without a little bit of help, some positive words to hold onto I wouldn't be where I stand right now, and I definitely would not be about to risk everything to study Music and Missions. Come on now, do you know me at all!

5.) Finally, a friend is a friend for life. As much as I know you don't believe me on this one I know it is true. Our friendship might change some but never will it die or go away. There is too much between us.

You know this isn't where I planned this to go. But sometimes it isn't about the crowd but it is about reaching the one. and if I can't reach the person that means the most to me right now, then how can expect to reach anyone else! I have to try to show you that it isn't one sided and if it means proclaiming to the world what our friendship means to me... so be it! I don't give up and I know you don't either. There is so much on the other side that you and I can't see! Just remember, I have been given white Puerto Rican blood now! :) "a true friend sticks to you like family!"

While the second half of this post was kind of intended for one person, my challenge to you is to examine the friendships in your life. What are they like, what could be better! and what can you do to better the other person's view of the relationship. Sometimes I get so caught up in what I am doing for my best friend that I forget to stop and look at what he is doing for me! How he has impacted my life and what my life would be like without him!

As corny as this sounds, for close to 3 years I prayed for a friend...
... and I got so much more than I ever expected!

christina nicole
Proverbs 18:24


  1. That's great, but I don't quite agree with you about a friend being there for life. I think sometimes people are meant enter your life for just certain matter of time. Whether it be a short period of time or a lifetime, I think just because someone isn't gonna be around until the time, doesn't make them any less of a friend.

  2. oh no! I completely understand what you mean! I just meant that a true friend... even though you may grow apart is still there. Like old friends from high school who meet up 30 years later and can pick up right from where they left off! :)