“I’ll pour pure water over you and scrub you clean. I’ll give you a new heart, put a new spirit in you."

Ezekiel 36:25 (The Message//Remix)

Sunday, June 17, 2012

Be Still and Know

I wrote this back in January and never posted it... just thought it was interesting!

Most have heard Psalm 46:10
"Be still and know that I am God"

This can be comforting at times but for the vast majority of us this phrase drives us nuts!

God whispers: "Be Still!"
Our Response: "Excuse me? Do you know what I have to get done?"

We then begin to throw our list of worldly things at God. About 5 or 6 items later we begin to question our insanity because we are "wasting" time telling the God of the universe what needs to be done, despite the fact that he already knows.

Sound Familiar?

Well for the past few weeks, this was the only message I kept receiving. I was in the midst of stress and a short span of time to make decisions and the only help I got was "be still!" AHHHHHH! Seriously thought I was going to die. Well, good news... I didn't and I made a decision. I am now home for a while and could not be more thrilled about it. God is working in me and through people I never would have imagined. I am learning that I have healed more than I realized and that I am ready to give it all. I am ready to go and hit the front lines. The difference is that I have learned that I am not fighting for my sake, nor on my strength. I am building my fortress on the rock which cannot be moved.

The point is that being still doesn't have to be impossible.

Christina Nicole

a fresh look at life

I really need to get better at blogging before I leave for Atlanta so I am really am going to try to write at least once a week. Topic: anything.

Today's topic: food

So my church is all about food. We strongly believe in Food fellowship and I can promise you that it works. All throughout the bible Jesus had some his must vulnerable times with people over a meal. For some reason food just brings us together.

I got to see this last week at Summerscape (our youth church camp).
Friendships were created because one kid happened to sit next to another. This was so cool to watch because Monday night at dinner the room looked like little pods of kids everywhere but by the end of the week these pods had become full tables. It was just really cool to see since our camp was about fighting as one.

God has been working in me lately (well, he is always working in my life... I'm just being observant) and for some reason food just seems to be everywhere. I will admit that I tend to forget to eat or I just don't eat well, but when I do eat with somebody I learn so much more about them. I go to my mom's house to bake some random dessert with her, I go to dinner with the college group, I eat after work with a friend. It doesn't matter what it is or with whom I am eating, I am learning all the time about the people around me. I just wonder what it is about food that brings down walls. For instance, first date? 90% of the time you go out to dinner and spend the evening getting to know one another.

So anyways, God time over (maybe)... So my mom started this baking blog and you all should check it out. She is phenomenal at baking and half the time she just makes it up as she goes.
Blog site: http://jeanettesherritze.blogspot.com/
Just do it! You won't regret it, I promise!

Well, Winshape camp for communities starts in the AM so I am peacing out! More to come soon, and hopefully an update on the internship and Atlanta. Oh! So I am now, 70 days away from going to Atlanta! What?!

"And they devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers."
Acts 2:42

Christina Nicole

Saturday, April 28, 2012

...the truth comes out.

So in one of the first blogs I wrote I admitted that I felt some sort of pull to missions. Well this girl is going on a missions trip to Atlanta from the end of August until December and I could not be more excited about it! Everything that God has been working on in me has just been building up for this and I cannot wait to see what God has in store for Atlanta, Georgia.

Until my team blog gets set up I will be using this site to keep updates on my trip and such. As of right now this is what I know. My goal is to reach the everyday people that still need to know who God is and the love he brings. I will be working with churches to do homeless outreach and other projects. Teaching women skills to help them find jobs and take care of their children. Working in an internet cafe helping immigrants adjust to American culture and get jobs, and finally tutoring elementary and middle school students after school. Something God has really placed on my heart is the importance of actions. Through my current job especially God has shown more than once that by acting with God's love he presents the time and opportunity to talk about him. More to come soon!

"Love God. Love your neighbor as yourself."
Christina Nicole

Saturday, January 14, 2012

... I love you

I know you'll heal, these hurts can't own you
I know how it feels, to be the one that doesn't know
So here I am to show you something deep within
All you ever needed, all the love you've never known

I'm the lullaby never sung, the hug on Christmas morn
I'll be the keeper of your dreams, all your secrets are safe with me
I'll be there saying "You can do it!" when no one else says that you can
I'll be the one to take your fears, I will always hold on to your hand

Hush don't cry
I am here in the night
I will always be here watching you
I am here to say... Just hang on

I know you'll heal, the hurts can't own you
there is so much more for you to know
Just hang on a little longer, I promise this is not the end
Remember... I love you 

I have to be here with you
because I am holding every breath you breathe
I want to give you everything you need
heal all the aches, I want to give you a reason to dream
Remember to listen cause I am always here singing 

I love you

Though our feelings come and go, God's love for us does not" 
C.S. Lewis

Anything and Everything
Christina Nicole

Friday, January 6, 2012

Everything is changing...

I sit here. A blank slate. Not quite a blank canvas but I feel as if my painter has taken me a different direction. Everything used before will only make me more beautiful and show my full potential, so I am choosing to trust my painter as he strips away the unwanted.

I will rise to my call and that call is Jesus.

My life doesn’t matter if I do not proclaim who he is. As I am being molded through all of this confusion I am realizing more and more just how much God gave. God gave his only son. My focus is on the word only… meaning nothing left. He gave everything, and then watched him be ripped to pieces, mocked, and hung on a cross – a thief’s death. God took everything he had, offered it to the world despite the humiliation that came from it, just so that he could save us. I think about how much I have gone through, and how much it has shaped me but to be honest very few know of it. I don’t take who I am and hang it on a cross, I tend to hide it inside because I am scared. What would people say? What did people say as Christ died on his cross? If I do not open and give everything I am to God then I am not answering my call. As crazy as it seems to so many people, if I am not giving my everything to Christ then I am not fulfilling my purpose and I am done living a lie.

I did not attend Passion but I assure you my heart was there and my ears heard what God had planned for me. For me, I heard these things (I did not get to see everything) God sent Christ and Christ sent us to finish his work. Christ sent us to be interrupted throughout our normal everyday things. We must embrace those interruptions with the full love of God. He did not turn away the woman who suffered from bleeding, he stopped, spoke with her, and healed her all before going back to what he was doing. What was amazing was how much this woman had to sacrifice to go. She had to bring out into public what was considered to be unclean, then she had to admit it to everyone, and fall before Jesus’ feet in front of everyone. With faith this woman came before God knowing how the public viewed her, and knowing that she could make Jesus “unclean” but she was healed for her faith. Seriously go read it. It is Luke 8: 40-54. Jesus allowed himself to be interrupted and he is calling us to do just that.

So God I want to give all I am. I want people to see you through me and I am praying for fearlessness. And no matter what direction I take I know that you will be there, guiding my steps. God if it means you rip away everything that I think I know then let the cleansing come. All that matters is that I take all that I have and give it to you. You gave your only, and so I give mine in return. I only have one life and it is yours.

Surrender is not something that we just sing about, it is something we live; Everyday of our unknown lives. Surrender is a lifestyle and everything is about to change.

"We raise our white flag. We surrender all to you, all to you! We raise our white flag! The War is over! Love has won. Your Love has come!" 

Anything and Everything
Luke 9:57-62
Christina Nicole

Sunday, January 1, 2012

I am finding love.

Do you ever feel like there is nowhere to run, no one to talk to, no place to feel safe, and just be yourself? Ever feel like the only way to fit in is be something you aren’t, to degrade everything you have built up inside of you to absolutely nothing just to believe that someone kind of enjoys your company.

Is it ok to have faith in something I can only feel, something beyond what I can see, something that others may not think is real? Is it ok to have hope for tomorrow, for a time in which I haven’t foreseen, is it really ok if my hope reaches things people just don’t understand? And what does it mean to love? Is it alright for me to love someone I have never met, someone that I have never seen, someone that maybe despises me? If love is all we need then why am I stranger to love? If love is what the world desires then why am I the freak because I can love unconditionally? Isn’t that what I am called to do, to love all with a love no one else can understand? To have faith in a love that maybe doesn’t exist, and hope that maybe others will see me show them that love?

Faith, hope, and love – that is all that is left… but what does it all really mean? To an outsider where can my heart be? To someone who just doesn’t get me am I the outsider, am I the freak, the one who means almost nothing! I want to reach the others I want them to see me for who I am, I want to be innocent and free, I want to have love overflowing from me. No pain or jealousy, rage or doubt, I want to be free living in peace and joy, beyond what may come tomorrow, beyond everything I may not know. I want to be love, and I want to be loved, but not just any love, I want to be unconditionally loved.

If I worry though, how will that love every reach me? Cause fear and worry reject the love bouncing toward me. For fear feeds from loneliness, which is not of my lover. I know I can depend on Him for anything and that I will always be loved. Even in times when all others tell me no, shove my name around, and complete the madness with hate, I know that love can always be found. I know that my name will always be called out with a gift to be sought out. A gift that no other can comprehend, because it is for me! Specifically and wonderfully made just for me.

Not saying that love is just for me! But love is shown in so many ways, and when my lover calls out my name it is my brand of love that he is reaching out with! Because I have loved in his name and sought out the needy and hurting I will always be loved abundantly. Because I have held my faith and hope out on a string for the world to see and take bites at I will always be fulfilled to my wildest dreams. And its because I dream big, that my savior is there to catch me!

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.” (1 Corinthians 13:6-8a)

Love can be seen, love can be shown, it’s something this world desperately needs to know. I may not encompass all that love has to offer but I know that if I am a willing vessel that God will shine his love through me. Let a prayer from so many years ago be my prayer again every day that I breathe. Cause I am not here walking for me. I am just a piece of God’s day, I am but a pixel in the image he sees. The fear I may have known can walk straight through that door, because love and fear cannot exist in this place. “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” (1 John 4:18).

God make me whole. make me clean. Teach me to see more than what my mere eyes can see. Cause Love is the need, and I need to be able to feed. Love for myself, so I can see me, for who I am, for who you are making me to be. And love for those around me, I will speak the words you speak. Let me be the house where you can shine your light, cause I am done with this world, I am setting my eyes on the prize. I cannot follow this place, but I’m here for your purpose. I am here for today, I mean nothing, but I am everything to you because I am yours. I rejoice in your truth, for it’s in you I am free. Free to stand for your Name, free dance and praise.

So once again I pray, this time for my sisters and brothers in Christ. May we all be a light to those who can’t see. May we all be the fruit for those hungry for the everlasting tree. Learn to give more than receive. Learn to be less than this world thinks we should be. Learn to be free, learn to be totally wrapped up in a savior we can’t see, but have the faith to believe. Let go, let live, learn to die everyday, for the sake of the cross. I freely give my everything… for the sake of unconditional love.

Anything and Everything
Christina Nicole